Christmas crank

Years ago a verbal scuffle broke out in the back of my classroom.

"Six days!"
"Seven days!"
"SIX!"
"SEVEN!"

The crux? How long it took G-d to create Earth. I calmed them down, and learning that each used King James as her source, suggested that they settle this by actually reading the Good Book instead of barking.

***

These are the shortest days of the year in this neck of the woods. Life needs sunlight, and the light is dying. The longest night of the year looms.

Mammals foolish enough to dance under electric lights go, well, bonkers. Much of my life exists outside of science, as it should. I come from a family that fed me the dominant mythology, a beautiful story that helps us get through these dark days. Other cultures have similar myths for similar reasons. The fading sun frightens us.

Our nation is careening towards cultural chaos as we blend the myths of American and Christian exceptionalism into a story that serves neither well.

I am a science teacher, but the words that follow are not science. They are, however, based on how the myths were constructed over generations, for good reasons.

The Christ was not born in the winter.

The Wise Men were not at the manger while The Christ was an infant.

The current version of Christianity is not in danger of extinction. It has the strength of the United States military behind it. Just ask the Afghans.

The Christ did not tell Constantine to put the cross on the shields of his soldiers before his battle against Maxentius. Constantine may have believed this, but it is our shame that we accept a myth utterly contrary to His words.

We move with energy from the sun, our mass built from the breath of the life before us. Carbon dioxide and water and sunlight play with a few strands of DNA. We are special, but no more special than the yeast that taught Jesus how to make wine.

Christian privilege is real. Try greeting a TSA agent with "Assalaamu Alaikum."

OK, I'll get off my high horse now.

Yes, another repeat. But, Lord, I get tired of the "War Against Christmas" myth.

The illustration is by Tripod2282, found here at Uncyclopedia, released to the public. I think....